THEME BY PISTACHI-O

"I am constantly perplexed and annoyed by the persistent bias against female bosses. Even many feminist women will unleash a torrent of misogynist tropes at the mere mention of female colleagues: Women are terrible bosses; female colleagues are the worst; women are back-stabbing, catty, two-faced, incompetent, etc.

This has not been my experience. I have had multiple female bosses, and I have loved working for all of them.

My first job out of college started as a temporary position at a reception desk. When I started, the president (a man) and vice-president (a woman) of the firm were traveling out of the office for a few days. I was told they’d be calling in for messages, and I was warned—repeatedly—that the vice-president, Helene, was a dragon lady, a bitch, a holy terror. The nicest way it was put to me is that she was “difficult.” I was admonished to be very careful about how I gave her messages to her, because she would destroy me if I made a mistake.

I made sure to provide her messages in precisely the way I’d been instructed, and she was perfectly polite to me over the phone. But, by the time she was due back in the office, I’d been warned about her so many times, in so many blunt and nasty ways, that I was, frankly, terrified of her.

Helene returned to the office one morning, an hour late as I would discover was her habit. She was a beautiful, fashionable, confident woman. She introduced herself brusquely, but welcomed me to the team. I was intimidated by the sheer force of her presence, but she seemed nice enough. I waited for the other shoe to drop, for the dragon lady to reveal herself.

That day never came.

Within a couple of months, my position had been made permanent, and I was quickly promoted to an assistant position in Helene’s department. Helene was tough. She had high expectations of me. But she was also an incredibly generous mentor. I was eager to learn, and she was keen to teach me. She wanted things done a certain way, but she was open to suggestions and encouraged me to challenge her. And if I ever came up with a better way to do something, she was grateful for the idea and let me know she was proud of me. She never took credit for my ideas; to the contrary, she championed me.

By the time I left, I was the director of her department, and I had my own office overlooking Lake Michigan. From reception to an executive office in five years. And it was in no small part because of Helene’s eminent willingness to teach, support, and empower me.

The thing is, Helene could indeed be “difficult.” But not with me. She was “difficult” with the male executives who treated her like shit, with the male staff who undermined her authority. She was “difficult” with people who treated her, the only female executive at the firm, fundamentally differently than they treated the men.

Funny that I developed a reputation for being “difficult,” too.

This has been my experience working for and with “difficult” women. I’m sure there are shitty female bosses in the world; of course there are. But lots of what supposedly constitutes a “difficult” female boss, or colleague, is frequently a reflection of dynamics to which she’s reacting.

Dynamics like the one in which people reject female bosses, instead of rejecting workplace misogyny."  - Melissa McEwan, Who’s the Boss? (via dee-lirious)

This is important, but I think sometimes this rhetoric gives white female bosses a pass to recreate oppressive power structures while still asserting this narrative that they are the most victimized in the office.

Full disclosure, this is based off of my own personal experiences. I’ve had two female managers. One existence has been fantastic, the other….

I could tell my first manager was very sensitive to misogyny and feeling treated like she’s less than for being female and blond. Books like Lean In were pivotal and inspiring for her. She had goals and worked hard to be where she was. However she talked down to, and isolated, every black staff member. Male or female. Us questioning her effectiveness as a leader became interpreted as her “obstacles as a female in power” yes, her defensive demeanor could very well be rooted in misogyny in the workplace and a lifetime of her fighting to be heard. But that then translated into silencing, and acting passively hostile to black staff members who questioned her methods and didn’t appreciate how they were treated and spoken to.

Looking back, I just wish there was more nuance in these conversations about women in power. Because most women in significant positions of power are white. Yes, it is likely that they have faced misogyny in their life and career, but that doesn’t excuse recreating those same power structure against staff of color as though we are the help and need to get out of their way as they’re too busy trying to “Lean In” as much as possible.

Thoughts? Other POC experiences with this in the workplace?

(via newwavefeminism)

mineva-zabi:

damn those tumblr sjw………always trying to make me think about how my actions could hurt someone else………….

officialfrenchtoast:

”..the Son of Man came not to be served, but to serve..”
-Matthew 20:28

officialfrenchtoast:

”..the Son of Man came not to be served, but to serve..”

-Matthew 20:28

WRITING TIP NO. 235577 

killerville:

female characters should be like the heads of the dreaded hydra. if you take one away, seven more must come back in her place.

dramatisecho:

favourite films // the grand budapest hotel

 M. Gustave: You see, there are still faint glimmers of civilization left in this barbaric slaughterhouse that was once known as humanity. Indeed that’s what we provide in our own modest, humble, insignificant… oh, fuck it.

dramatisecho:

favourite films // the grand budapest hotel

M. Gustave: You see, there are still faint glimmers of civilization left in this barbaric slaughterhouse that was once known as humanity. Indeed that’s what we provide in our own modest, humble, insignificant… oh, fuck it.

queertheoryissexy:

blessedharlot:

qamaranwzaytoun:

readafuckingbook:

This Bridge Called My Back - Writings by Radical Women of Color
I don’t care what gender studies or queer theory class you’ve taken, you need to read this book, but be warned, it is a rare find and might expensive. It contains several essays by womanists discussing their experience, racism, poverty, how racism pervaded the feminist movement in the early 1980s and most importantly the individual experiences of asian pacific, black, american indian and latina/chicana women. This words you find in this book and the truths that will make your soul sick are imperrative for understanding the history of racism, feminism, systematic oppression and white privilege. These are stories that have, even today, been swept under the rug and out of sight. 
You need to read this fucking book. 

PDF version downloadable here.

PDF!!!

I’ve read it, but adding this to the reading list anyway.

queertheoryissexy:

blessedharlot:

qamaranwzaytoun:

readafuckingbook:

This Bridge Called My Back - Writings by Radical Women of Color

I don’t care what gender studies or queer theory class you’ve taken, you need to read this book, but be warned, it is a rare find and might expensive. It contains several essays by womanists discussing their experience, racism, poverty, how racism pervaded the feminist movement in the early 1980s and most importantly the individual experiences of asian pacific, black, american indian and latina/chicana women. This words you find in this book and the truths that will make your soul sick are imperrative for understanding the history of racism, feminism, systematic oppression and white privilege. These are stories that have, even today, been swept under the rug and out of sight. 

You need to read this fucking book. 

PDF version downloadable here.

PDF!!!

I’ve read it, but adding this to the reading list anyway.

partybarackisinthehousetonight:

mark, my words. *mark brings me my dictionary* thank you mark

its-tuesday-again:

i just found out that siri will read emojis

in related news, this is the best day of my life

Anonymous asked: do you even care about grammar

shitrichcollegekidssay:

grammar and spelling are really important to me. I actually study grammar and spelling in typing styles. It’s not important to me as “WOW THEY SPELLED A WORD WRONG” or “WOW THEY USED THE WRONG YOUR” but rather I look for repeating themes in typing styles and can link that to a grapholect–or an internet dialect/register [typing styles unique to certain parts of the internet]

For instance a common grapholect is the doge meme speak shit.

"Much grammar, so spelling, very grapholect. wow"

thats a very specific and deliberate way of typing. There is a correct way to type in this grapholect and an incorrect way to type in this grapholect, and I think that’s fucking cool.

How about we look at language rapidly evolving–due to constant need to type and communicate via text, and stop clinging to classist/ableist/racist/sexist/etc. old white guy’s language wet dream.

therabbitprince:

posukkum:

Pray for South Korea

Tears are streaming down my face. I don’t care what your belief is, please send anything, even good vibes, to these kids because oh my god they are suffering so much. The water is muddy and it’s freezing and they are dying and they’re only seventeen.. 

These children are so scared.. desperately reassuring the world that yes, they are alive, please come for them. They’re messaging their little sisters, apologizing that they won’t be able to grant a request when they’re seconds away from death and just

oh.. oh my god. oh my fucking god words cannot describe the pain I’m feeling

chilled:

*throws lamp at you* you need to lighten the fuck up

fuckyeahvintage-retro:

Blouse Collars, 1940s-50s - By Charlotte Dymock.

funkybug:

i am so tired and so gay

thetinyhoboart:

New buttons available on Etsy! $2.50 apiece or 5 for $10!!! ❤️❤️❤️

❤️ www.thetinyhobo.etsy.com ❤️